Retards Keep Mailing Me. Please Stop.

Just having a blog at all, even one of fair-to-middling popularity and narrow focus like this one, means you get a lot of stupid mail. Actual readers of the blog send in tips all the time, and I use most of them. But I also get a lot of “hot tips” from guerrilla marketing companies (ones that obviously aren’t very good), Google Farm pages, and the like. This morning I was blessed with this:

Hello
I’ve found something on the internet that could be a good material for a blog post in your Music Blog. Take a look at “Top 10 Techy Sunglasses with Mp3 Players”

Have a great day

Best regards, Micle Mihai Cristian.

I left the link out, because I can’t be bothered, quite frankly. So I actually replied to this one, something I don’t normally do:

Why on earth do you think I or my readers would find that interesting?

Chris Randall
Positron Records, Inc.

A few minutes later, I get this back:

Because is related to sound and music, and I’m sure they love everything related to this.Don’t you ?

Wouldn’t it be nice if it was as simple as saying “you’re a retard. Don’t ever write me again?” (Which is exactly what I did.)

Another company that keeps writing me is an Indian software chop-shop that makes extremely dumbed-down versions of popular audio software (e.g. Soundforge, Cinescore, and the like.) They’re as transparent as can be. They wrote me a month or two ago, offering NFR copies in exchange for a review on this site. I wrote back and said “listen, you really don’t want me to review your software. Seriously. Take a better look at AI.” They’re like “okay, but do you want NFR copies anyways?” I didn’t answer that, then a week later I get exactly the same letter as their original communication.

So, this can be considered an open letter to all the fucking morons out there that read a “get rich on the internet” book: stop writing me. Seriously. I don’t have anything nice to say about you, and never will. I’m not going to put a link up to your site unless you make high-end audio gear or did something phenomenally stupid. So go away.