August 31, 2006

Fucktard Of The Week (or not?)

by Chris Randall
 



Of course, we all do this. That goes without question. But we don't film it and inflict it on others. So, he's just a fucktard for filming it and uploading it, not actually doing it, I guess. (Of course, most of us try to play with some semblance of timing, which bears mentioning. Quantization was invented for people like this.)


UPDATE: The verdict: not a fucktard, according to the readers of Analog Industries, who are well versed in such matters.

 
 
 

26 comments:

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Aug.31.2006 @ 10:27 PM
RexRhino
Yawn inspiring... but not fucktarded.

But I wonder, what is the point of having all that modular gear if you are just going to make it sound like your typical software synth? I thought the point of having a modular system was so you could do all those Vince Clark style random drum noise loops, or some wierd frequency modulation that changes the sound and rythym over time... etc..

The kid could have saved himself some money and just purchased a Micro Korg or something. He could still do the same type of stuff. Synthesis wise, I have heard a lot more interesting stuff from people running a cheap sampler through a bunch of guitar effects (some phaser, some distortion, delay and tweak the wah wah, and you have a poor man's modular). What is the point of having a modular system if you are just going to patch it to sound like a generic synth?

 
 

 
Aug.31.2006 @ 11:26 PM
john_o
wow, yeah i guess he's more of a fucktard for going through the trouble of making opening credits and trying to pass this off as anything more than just a home movie of a dude playing around with his stuff.

maybe i'll have someone videotape me going into guitar center and trying out a guitar, i can run through half-remembered versions of stairway to heaven and sweet home alabama. i can call that a 'live performance.'

i'm sure most of you all have seen this but just in case. for a real serious fucktard there's always this:

link [www.keytarinc.co...]">link [www.keytarinc.co...]

 
 

 
Sep.01.2006 @ 12:48 AM
mike kiraly
My vote is for non-fucktard. In my opinion, a fucktard is someone who does not / will not / can not have the sense to know any better.

However...

There are plenty of these kinds of videos around and therefore maybe this kind of thing should get it's own category. A label for those people that posesses all of the pre-requisite faculties to prevent their shame, but have a momentary lapse of bahavioural censorship.

I believe Goa Gil here is just such a man. Or maybe he didn't know he was being filmed. There is always the benefit of the doubt....nah, f*** that.

 
 

 
Sep.01.2006 @ 12:50 AM
mike kiraly
btw, i don't know why i censored the word f*** in the previous post, especially considering that the word that's the central theme of this thread is fucktard.
 
 

 
Sep.01.2006 @ 1:53 AM
cacealian
He's too boring to really reach true fucktardedness.

RexRhino read my thoughts. But then if you listen to most of the sound samples on the synthesizers.com site, it's the same thing. Or on any mid-70s TD album for that matter. What was that giant moog doing except running the 2 oscillators, a filter and an envelope from the sequencer?

 
 

 
Sep.01.2006 @ 3:17 AM
Suit & Tie Guy
no this isn't a track i would listen to more than a few times, but he's got some nice ideas in there and i seriously doubt this guy posted this vid for any reason other than to say "man, i love playing this thing."

here chris, why don't you post these vids in your blog too. i'm sure you'd think these perfectly innocent videos of people having fun with music proves they are "fucktards."

link [www.youtube.com]">link [www.youtube.com]

link [www.youtube.com]">link [www.youtube.com]

link [www.youtube.com]">link [www.youtube.com]

link [www.youtube.com]">link [www.youtube.com]

there: it's a whole month worth of fucktards for the analogindustries blog.

 
 

 
Sep.01.2006 @ 3:22 AM
Suit & Tie Guy
"Or on any mid-70s TD album for that matter. What was that giant moog doing except running the 2 oscillators, a filter and an envelope from the sequencer?"

there's actually a lot of sophistication going on if you bothered to pay attention. also if you ever played a Moog system you'd know that's all you can really do with it. they are quite vanilla.

modularity is only one benefit of a modular synthesiser. the other benefit is the interface ... having everything in front of you at all times, with everything spaced out with big knobs makes it quite a visceral experience.

 
 

 
Sep.01.2006 @ 4:51 AM
mitchell
I say go easy on Mr. Mootbooxle... he's the poster child for synthesizers.com, and it's kind of nice to see a young guy who can appreciate analog modular gear. Personally I hate super-wank solos (I veer toward the Numan/old Human League end of synth-dom), but he's being artistic in his own way, and that's better in my book than the average twenty-something hip-hop-loving meatheads that I get to enjoy the company of when I do cover gigs.

I do agree that maybe you could do something niftier with a modular, but most people don't enjoy the sound of crossmod lasers as much as I...

 
 

 
Sep.01.2006 @ 6:28 AM
noisegeek
I'm not sure I'd call him a fucktard, but it certainly makes me fear any collaboration between Rick Wakeman and DJ Tiesto.
 
 

 
Sep.01.2006 @ 9:37 AM
Angstrom
I don't think he reaches the hights of Fucktarddom , but he made me feel a lot better about MY keyboard skills. He plays like there is some huge latency on the keyboard and he is trying to compensate fluctuating with each note.Surely it's obvious that his timing is wonky?
I sometimes (often) have rubber finger days when I can't seem to play on the beat, but I usually hit delete and go for a walk instead. I certainly wouldn't post a video of it.

I propose a players equivalent of Nyquist, here it is :

You may only play notes at HALF of the speed that you think you are capable of playing.

 
 

 
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