September 6, 2005

ePray...

by Chris Randall
 



This kind of shit cracks me the fuck up. What we have here is a "vintage" (and by that I mean the Webster's definition, "really fucking old and busted") RCA broadcast console up on eBay. It clearly says in the auction description that it is basically a total tear-down, never mind the 1000-odd words you get from the pictures, which show a unit that may or may not have been on the ground floor of a tenament house in the 9th Ward in New Orleans last week.


But that's not the funny part. Go ahead and check out the auction. Look at the title. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, this fantastic piece of cobwebbed, corroded, well, let's just go ahead and call it something that belongs in a dumpster, somehow qualifies for posterity on the basis that it spent time in a room with a Neve console. Now, if that is a demonstrable fact, and thus lends the item credence, I think we should know what kind of Neve console. Or was there just some Neve outboard. I mean, it would have more Neve Mojo in it if it brushed up against one of the A.I.R. custom Neves than if it just sat on top of a rack with a couple 1081s in it, you know? Maybe it spent time next to (or perhaps underneath) a little Kelso. That's not much Mojo, there. Or was it with a Capricorn? Most people that have worked on a Capricorn say it isn't a "real" Neve. (I've worked on a Capricorn, and thought it suitably Neve-ish for my purposes, but I make industrial music, so there's that to consider...)


Seriously, though. I've just about had enough of this shit. In the unlikely event that you'd actually want this piece of complete crap, does the fact (true or not) that it sat in a room with something made by one of the various companies that have held the name "Neve" have _any_ effect on its value? At all? There's salesmanship, and then there's snake oil...

 
 
 

3 comments:

 
 

 
Sep.07.2005 @ 12:31 AM
edanderson
actually, that very piece was under my bench for the past year or so. and in that time, a few very expensive neve consoles have come in and out of the shop, mere FEET from where the RCA sat, in a dilapidated heap. true, the only *installed* and operational neve console in the joint is in a neighboring room. it is a pretty fucking sweet console though.

sadly, nearly every pro-audio listing on eBay has the word "neve" in the title somewhere. in this case, the relevance was less tangential than some (which says something), and intended nearly as much for humor as search hits. as glad as we'll be to get rid of that thing, andrew is a pretty laconic guy, and couldn't be bothered to much for the auction description. nice pickup, btw, finding it what, 5 minutes into the 7 day auction?

ed

 
 

 
Sep.07.2005 @ 12:34 AM
edanderson
der, whoops, i guess the auction only has a day left now.

ed

 
 

 
Sep.07.2005 @ 11:39 AM
Chris Randall
Now you've gone and made me feel bad. I'm discovering that it sometimes sucks to be a shit-talking "journalist."

-CR

 
 

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