Diamond Dave is, in actual fact, The Real Thing...
The creator (and main motivator) of the Gearslutz thread was our good friend Adam Jay, who has graced these very pages several times with his excellent kit. Long story short, Diamond Dave got wind of the thread, and wrote Jules (the operator of Gearslutz) with all kinds of drama. Jules, not being very fond of drama, just removed the thread, which is expedient, but not much fun. However, I'm my own ISP, and could give two shits, and love drama to boot.
Diamond Dave made what some would construe as a mistake by calling Mr. Jay. When greeted by voice mail, he left a 10 minute message, wherein he told Mr. Jay that while he could wear a shirt that says "I'm A Pirate," that didn't mean he was one. Also, his father is an Airborn Ranger (retired), his mother is FBI (retired), his brother isn't happy, he might sue Gearslutz, and he is the Real Thing, among many other excellent tidbits.
The only possible thing that could make this better would be if Adam found a way to make a recording of his voice mail so he could share this with us, right? Oh, wait. he did. Enjoy.