July 11, 2006

Are you fucking kidding me?

by Chris Randall
 



Take everything you ever knew about fucktards in the music industry and just throw it out the window. This guy trumps all. The bit that cracks me up is the "up to $900,000" music tour. (Music tour?) When SMG was at its height, c. 96/97, our burn rate on the road was about $300K a month. And that was ten years ago. And we sure as FUCK didn't have any "five star" accomodations. Mostly we slept on the bus. This cat is fucking offensive. But on the bright side, he does have Internet Downloading Capabilities. Maybe he'll see this and challenge me to some mano a mano fisticuffs or something. (Thanks, bringmeup, for ruining my night.)


BUT WAIT: Check it. This fucknut has a real live website. Dear sweet baby jesus. I couldn't help but hit the photo gallery of Diamond Dave's big budget million dollar private-jet havin' studio. Remember that guy that had the "pro studio built around an i30"? That guy had pretty nice kit compared to Dave. Now, I'm not gonna begrudge someone their project studio, and in this business, perception is 9/10 of the package, but still and all, you gotta draw the line between fudging a bit and out-and-out bullshit.

We are currently looking for partners, investors
there is no risk factor.
company is honest and truthful.


Yeah? How 'bout I give ol' Butch a call and see how he liked his Diamond Dave experience?

 
 
 

59 comments:

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Jul.11.2006 @ 3:06 AM
antix2
Sweet Lord Jesus. I hope this marks the all time low. That actually made me nauseous.

Only way you can make up for this is bringing us some news on the Pulse Filter.

"... Could be two days, could be a week. Won't be long, in any case." CR June 28

 
 

 
Jul.11.2006 @ 5:23 AM
Tomer
i didnt understand even one fucking thing,who is this guy and why exacly does he want my money?! LOL

is this the sort of people record companies contact in order to set up tours and recording sessions?

 
 

 
Jul.11.2006 @ 6:07 AM
inteliko
That guy got some pics from his slideshow copy and pasted straight from a Full sail ad.I shit you not.
 
 

 
Jul.11.2006 @ 6:26 AM
thesimulacre
Yeah, and the screenshots to prove he watched "Mix it Like a R---"
Makes me feel better about things in general. Yeah.
 
 

 
Jul.11.2006 @ 7:23 AM
musicmachinemaker
a pro-class engineer with a pro-class crap webcam/light/headset
 
 

 
Jul.11.2006 @ 8:03 AM
Jaysen
He's using his Xbox headset inbetween gaming to talk to someone. He has the Internet after all.

But seriously, all the money he makes (up to $900,000 for a tour) probably goes to feed his coke habit, hence the shoddy webcam/studio/hairstyle.

 
 

 
Jul.11.2006 @ 8:21 AM
TD
This guy is all kinds of full of sh*t...

and I second the motion on the FullSail pics. This guy is a LAMER...

definite FT...

 
 

 
Jul.11.2006 @ 8:44 AM
exogenous
on top of it all, the youtube recording has this intense 60 hz hum running through it
 
 

 
Jul.11.2006 @ 9:43 AM
ecallender
Why y'all playa' hatin'? Jus' cos' you ain't attained coveted "Grand Master Supastar Engineer" titles like the DD103? You ain't got no 'CD store', neither. How many package tours you done, son? Rekka'nize, bitches! Oops. Gotta go, my wife Jennifer Garner is callin'
 
 

 
Jul.11.2006 @ 9:52 AM
dm
What are you fuckers talking about, he's got access to the Charts!!!
 
 

 
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