May 12, 2006

A plea for help!

by Chris Randall

Okay, there are, on a daily basis, approximately 3300 unique visitors to this site. It would stand to reason that one of you is an upright bass player in the Willamette Valley. Seriously. I have paid session work for you. Of course, you'll have to schlepp your big-ass bass out to the corner of No and Where, but it'll be fun. I have a never-ending supply of Hebrew Nationals and Newcastle Brown Ale, and about 20 songs that need bass playing on. Hook a brother up. Drop me a line if you have an upright bass, know at least one Tom Waits song by heart, and live within a hundred miles of the cultural black hole of Salem, OR.

UPDATE: hot dog semantics aside, I think I found somebody.



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May.13.2006 @ 9:28 AM
what exacly is it this "hebrew national" ?

May.13.2006 @ 9:58 AM
Google says it is a kind of kosher hotdog.

May.13.2006 @ 10:05 AM
Im not Jewish,but they are the best dogs,awesome on the grill...they answer to a higher authority...or are they lips and ass like every other dog ,just blessed by a rabbi?

May.13.2006 @ 10:34 AM
Chris Randall
I'm not Jewish either, but I did live in New York City for seven years, which is almost the same thing.

And to answer your question, Hebrew National are the best hot dogs ever. They are, of course, lips and ass, but they're God's own lips and ass. Seriously, go find some. Most high-end grocery stores would have them. Or a really good deli. Plus, you really have to stand by a company that sells something like this:

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Long story short, they are the Audio Damage of hot dogs



May.13.2006 @ 11:54 AM
>>Long story short, they are the Audio Damage of hot dogs<<

Didn't John Lennon say something similar about the Beatles just before he was shot?


May.13.2006 @ 3:50 PM
hmmm i guess its on made and distributed,
here in israel we dont have that stuff :P

May.13.2006 @ 5:07 PM
Chris Randall
Hebrew National Hot Dogs are one of the four reasons that America (and specifically New York City) aren't that bad. You don't have them in Israel because you guys obviously have better things to do than obsess over hot dog quality.



May.14.2006 @ 2:32 PM
Does Fucktard of the week have the day off??

May.14.2006 @ 2:36 PM
OH he goes
link []">link []

May.14.2006 @ 5:58 PM
"German Dudelsack" ! wow let me say that again "German Dudelsack"

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