December 8, 2005

Hard-Core Gear Porn Friday!!!

by Chris Randall
 



I don't know whether to thank Dave Copeland for sending me such an obvious Hard Core Gear Porn link, or chastise him for looking at such a travesty in the first place. This studio, which belongs to contemporary Christian musician Tom Gross is as middle-of-the-road boring as a studio can be. It's really quite sad, and an excellent example of how bad things can get when a musician doesn't do drugs, drink, or smoke.


I mean, hey, whatever gets you through the day, and an ASCAP check for play on CCM stations spends the same as one for play on MTV's The Real World, I guess. But I've never seen a studio with so much stuff in it I didn't want. It's really quite amazing. This is like the keyboard section of a store that specializes in band instruments. (You know the ones I mean, when you're playing in LaCross, Wisconsin, and your drummer is on his last pair of sticks, and you find a store that has Vic Firth 2B, but they're like $7.00 a pair, but the place is right across the street from the club, so what are you gonna do? Yeah, that place. You know the one I'm talking about.)


So, seriously, if you know this guy, go over to his house and put out a cigarette on his carpet. Or something. This is just out of hand. He's managed to assemble a complete studio of _bad_ Roland gear. It's weird, because Roland has put out so much good stuff, it's hard to avoid. But this guy figured out a way. And TWO MACKIE BOARDS!!! Fuck. It's like pissing in the wind. It really is.

 
 
 

29 comments:

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Dec.09.2005 @ 7:14 PM
Chris Randall
"Someday this guy is going to google himself, and then he'll be really sad."

Well, that may be true, but then again, you obviously haven't listened to the MP3 of "How Great Is His Love," which features all this awesome Roland gear.

link [www.tomgross.co...]">link [www.tomgross.co...]

(I'm left wondering if that's bad grammar, or if he forgot the question mark, or what.) The point being, that at this stage of an artists' development, a little constructive criticism can go a long ways.

-CR

 
 

 
Dec.09.2005 @ 9:01 PM
Wade Alin
holy shit.

 
 

 
Dec.09.2005 @ 10:32 PM
shamann
"How Great Is His Love" would be correct grammar if viewed not as a question but as a statement of assertion. Try saying it in your best Reverend Ike impression with an "O" in front of it.

I've chosen not to say anything about the song. I think it's best if I don't. Except to say it's comforting to know that 1986 wasn't lost but in fact taken in and given eternal life by the Christian music set.

 
 

 
Dec.09.2005 @ 11:19 PM
shamann
On the upside, at least Sonicstate will be happy to know that at least one person out there eagerly reads their news page.
 
 

 
Dec.09.2005 @ 11:31 PM
giantm
On a positive note, the google links haven't started pointing to general midi covers of C+C music factory songs composed for the D-50 yet...
 
 

 
Dec.10.2005 @ 12:20 PM
Heretic_D?
Now I feel like a total ass, because I said in effect the same thing on the SMG.com blogthread.

Of course, every time I go to a "goth/industrial" club to see a show, the openers NEVER fail to run a shitty Roland.

 
 

 
Dec.10.2005 @ 1:08 PM
synthetic
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad with the google comment ??he deserves this jury of his peers. Perhaps he'll take a long look at his setup and get some proper gear. The tune is truly bad, especially "repay his debt," [cash register sound effect].

 
 

 
Dec.10.2005 @ 11:08 PM
Aenemone Carbuncler
so that's Roland's market! i suspected it, but... really didn't know what their shit could be used for. Now, i see the light from the d-beam. Yes, once upon a time Roland made some nice things, but about 20 years ago, samplers and the DX7 killed them and I guess they never recovered and are now very spiteful.
 
 

 
Dec.11.2005 @ 12:26 AM
Aenemone Carbuncler
link [www.carbon111.co...]">link [www.carbon111.co...]
I predict is your next gear porn friday. but he he has anime so that could be a a problem, anime of course is Japanese for Morman.
 
 

 
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