December 25, 2011

Happy Holidays!

by Chris Randall
 



Normally, someone like me who is non-religious (I don't choose to use the term "atheist" because it implies actively disbelieving in something, which is in and of itself a belief) and who is decidedly left-of-center politically would be stumbling all over himself to provide a "Happy... something!" that is both completely ecumenical and entirely secular.

This is a difficult task, because you have to take in to account the "reason for the season," which (aside from the axial tilt of the planet) is essentially Judaeo-Christian in basis, plus the amalgamation of Christian, pagan, and modern inventions that comprise "Christmas," plus all the made-up recent shit (the Wiccan iteration of Yule, Kwanzaa, et al), plus real Atheists who get all prissy if you even imply that the modern version of Sinterklaas and the Baby Jesus have anything at all to do with the fact that it is late December. (I've actually heard someone utter the following phrase with righteous indignation: "First of all, Jesus was born in the summer.") Did I leave anyone out? Oh, Jews and Muslims, who have their own fucked up shit all wrapped up in words like "tradition" and what-not, but which conveniently fall close enough to the Christ Mass to cause all sorts of headaches. Cthulhu only knows what the hell goes on over in the exotic Orient.

So you know what? I just ain't gonna bother. It's Christmas. Have a good time! Merry Christmas, Happy New Year, and the best for your endeavors in the year to come, no matter where you are or what you believe!
 
 
 

36 comments:

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Dec.25.2011 @ 5:21 PM
bongo_x
>An agnostic is defined as a chickenshit atheist<

Atheists and Evangelicals are the same thing to me, two sides of a coin. They both pretend to know all about more than it's possible to know.

I always thought an agnostic was just an unbeliever without the ego, or someone who doesn't give a shit and doesn't want to argue about it. All the atheists I know won't fucking stop talking about religion.
 
 

 
Dec.25.2011 @ 6:15 PM
Chris Randall
I'm with bongo_x. Either approach is hubris.

-CR
 
 

 
Dec.25.2011 @ 6:26 PM
Trackdriver
I actually believe in a god. Not necessarily a good god and I don't worship any. If the christian god is the true one then I have some things to discuss with him. Anyway, Merry Xmas to you all :-)
 
 

 
Dec.25.2011 @ 7:19 PM
beauty pill
link [bit.ly]

And Merry Christmas.

- c
 
 

 
Dec.25.2011 @ 8:17 PM
Scodiddly
I'm with bongo_x. Atheists do believe in something. I call myself an agnostic because I just don't know, and because I'm not worried that I don't know.

Maybe I'll find out someday, meanwhile I should at least be nice to other people simply because it ultimately makes my own life better.
 
 

 
Dec.25.2011 @ 8:52 PM
analogcre8or
Here's to not having to define a reason, religion, spiritual or other belief, non belief, brain washing, cult, food obsession, guilt trip, big corp power trip, perversion or whatever it is to you, in order to simply enjoy a time of the year when it has become an extremely widespread 'thing' to share some good times and cheers with those people that matter the most to you, and who you might not spend that much time with, at least not in the same way, during the rest of the year. Merry X-mas and Happy New Year to all.
 
 

 
Dec.25.2011 @ 9:25 PM
spalky
You know, I used to walk around being all atheist, and trying to talk to everyone about how atheist I was. Then I realized that it was as big of a waste of my life to do that as it would be if I was a hardcore evangelical going around talking about Jesus all the time.

I think that the best approach is to never think of or discuss it in any serious way. IMO it's really impossible to know, and not worth even calling myself an agnostic.

Christmas is a nice holiday for friends and family and maybe in 800 years folks won't even remember it's origins.

I don't think that a football would make a very Christmas present
 
 

 
Dec.25.2011 @ 10:08 PM
boobs
Festivus

happy whatever you believe for whatever.
 
 

 
Dec.25.2011 @ 11:39 PM
Chris Randall
What Chad linked to, exactly. I typed my earlier reply on my phone, so it was necessarily brief, but my point was that I'm smart enough to know what I don't know, and I simply don't know. Some people would say that science is enough, but science doesn't traditionally deal in absolutes; science is smart enough to know that better or different science is likely to come around and dispute any absolutes it may throw up. Just a couple weeks ago, although it turned out to be bullshit, people were having a serious conversation about whether the LHC measured particles travelling faster than the speed of light.

Serious people, in a serious conversation about the most absolute of all scientific absolutes being not so absolute. This makes me happy, and proves the point that any absolute is simply a statement based upon observable evidence at the time the absolute is created.

People that say there is no God, and people that say there is and he talks to them are in the same exact boat. You simply don't know, and saying anything other than "I'm pretty sure about this, but all the facts aren't in" is utter fabrication. One could say that the beauty of faith is that it doesn't require empirical evidence; well, you can't prove a negative, and that's an absolute. So atheists have the same faith that evangelicals do.

Am I an agnostic? I guess. Is there a "don'tgiveashit" option?

-CR
 
 

 
Dec.26.2011 @ 12:31 AM
Computer Controlled
I just been saying Happy Synthmas for the past few years. Fuck all the rest. May all your Sine Waves be pure =o]
 
 

 
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